njc2007 (njc2007) wrote,
njc2007
njc2007

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Why?

Why is it that a simple comment from someone can send me spiraling into massive depression? I can see this person's point of view, but the criticism brought back every negative comment anyone has ever given me. It also brought back memories of everything I have ever done wrong. I could confront this person and say, "See what your comment did to me," but it is not this person's responsibility to make me feel good. Besides, the comment was not mean spirited, my defective brain just chose to interpret it that way. Rationally, I know this is no big deal, but I just can't get past it. The antidepressant drugs usually take care of this, but I have been in tears and despair for about twelve hours. I'm thinking I'm no good. Why bother to work toward a career change now? I am almost 50, fat, and useless. It was hard enough to get a job when I was young. Why not just cut my losses and throw myself from the bridge? If the fall doesn't kill me, hypothermia will. What's the point in going on?
Tags: depression
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